When your man is popular

Perhaps your partner is good-looking, follows and is followed by many people on social media. This might feel threatening for you. Even for a secure person, this might sometimes cause them to have questions.

If you are already insecure, then this is a major challenge you need to address.

Here are some suggestions to consider :

The foundation on which a relationship is built determines the outcomes.

If your man or partner chose you out of the many people they follow, then that is a point that can help you to focus on your relationship.

Self-confidence

Are you confident and secure in yourself? No matter how trustworthy your partner is, if you struggle with insecurity, that might affect your relationships.

Pre-existing situations

Did you find him following these people already?

In that case, that is what he likes.

He can choose to change that if he wishes.

Your own states

If you feel threatened by the people who comment or follow you partner, consider how these profiles threaten you or your relationship?

As long as you continue to trust and allow you partner to be, do and continue what they like, your relationship might work out well.

Be in the moment and continue to be fun to be around.

The art of self-parenting

SIFTSEM and self-parent and meet your needs for safety and to be valued. There are unmet needs behind your triggers.

Reality

While you might struggle with his online activity, or when he comments on and responds to other women's profiles, remember he also meets other women and might talk to them face to face in your absence.

This might be at work, in public etc?

What would you do about them?

You are not likely to be in a position to fight off every person a man talks to.

His freedom and choices

You cannot stop someone from talking to people in this life, or people he meets. That is a sign of lack of trust and insecurity. If you do not trust him, this is an indication that you need to work on trusting yourself.

Chronic trust is also a reason to end a relationship.

Work on self-love and self-trust.

Trust and allow him to do what is best for the relationship.

Focus on your relationship. If you are uncomfortable or have insecurities, do not follow him on social media. This prevents unnecessary triggers as you heal.

Do not ruin your relationship by trying to change someone. Or ruin your relationship for people who do not even know much about your partner beyond social media. Sometimes, people who are not even interested in him romantically.

The only reason he might do something is when you are insecure, and you act on your insecurities. You can end up abusive from hypervigilance, which might lead him to feeling unsafe.

If he has his own unhealed traumas, he might them seek a way out by accommodating some of his fans or followers.

If your relationship is working well, he knows he cannot mess up a good thing.

You cannot make anyone do anything they are not willing to do. If you love and trust yourself, and he messes up, he will have lost a good woman. Let go of control.