If you are still crushing on an ex turned friend and they break
- Memory
- Nov 17, 2024
- 2 min read
When your ex who is now friends with you and are interested in breaks up here are some reflections
Sometimes you hold on to an ex in the hope that one day you can be more than just friends.
Be mindful of being a rebound and having your heart broken. The challenge sometimes is we have a need to be needed and that doesn't mean we are helping. We're giving to get.
We have expectations that when we provide support it will be rewarded by your ex now turned friend wanting a relationship with you.
If you have feelings for your friend and ex, advice them to seek support to heal then just be a friend.
When you were friends, were you spending time or you simply were someone to vent to? If you were just a venting friend then if you start doing too much you can end up friend zoned again.
Meet your friend here and there, but not often and not for relationship.
Avoid spending nights together or going to each other's houses if you're likely to be tempted to sleep with them.
Otherwise,
It will look like you're taking advantage of your ex's situation.
Or taking advantage of your ex while vulnerable.
You might also end up being taken for granted when you provide the physical warmth if your ex still wants their recent ex.
If you want a relationship, step back and allow your ex to go through the process of break up without saving them. People appreciate their situation when they go through the pain.
Do not rescue the ex from the consequences of their action or experience.
Also, be honest about why your relationship ended with your ex.
What has changed with that?
Your exs new break up doesn't erase issues you had in your previous relationship.
And you need to acknowledge if your ex also had some issues in their recently ended relationship. Your ex might not stop their patterns because you came back. In fact making yourself too available can be an enabling to your ex now turned friend.
They have np reason to change their patterns because they have someone to catch them in their present fall.
It is essential you respect yourself and do not ignore red flags or act desperate.
Give your ex to work through their break up so that if you both decide to reconnect you are ready to start a healthy relationship.
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