Serious relationship or you are taking the situation seriously?

Are you in a serious relationship or are you taking the situation seriously?  There is a difference between these two statements when you enter a relationship. You might be in a situation of sorts and both of you are probably pursuing different outcomes.  Or you are in a situation that you are taking seriously when the level of serious is reaching that of a committed relationship. Perhaps only you are committed to the relationship , but your person is not in a committed relationship with you.  Maybe they made it clear from the start, that they are looking for a casual relationship. Perhaps you have fallen in love and have now decided you are in a committed relationship. So, you are waiting for them to change. To become invested and committed. 

Avoid changing or moving goalposts without mutual consultation and confirmation. A relationship has to be agreed and the goals discussed. You both need to be on the same page. Maybe you both initially agreed that you are in a serious relationship, but the other person is not acting seriously for some reason. Mirror and match their effort so that you are on the same format of serious.

If you meet someone looking for a casual relationship and you are not looking for same, let them pass. Not all buses are going towards your direction.   If you were both looking for casual relationship initially, and you are now falling in love, you can stop sex. Express how you are feeling. If they are not keen to change the status, let go. You will get hurt if you get serious.   If you find a committed relationship deteriorating into a casual situation and not progressing because they are not serious for any reason, let go. You cannot fix this alone.  Own your experience and avoid blaming the other person for using you, for wasting your time or for being toxic. Make decisions in your best interest.  Try to discern to avoid getting serious if they are not serious.

You have the power and ability to walk out, walk away and choose differently. You can find someone who is as serious as you are about them. Recognise whether your relationship is serious or you are just taking a situation that is not serious , seriously. There is a difference.