Self-soothing

Self-soothing

When you are triggered and struggle with same trigger, or repeated triggers, you end up miserable, unhappy and consequently live a knee jerk life. As repeatedly shared, life will happen and people will do what people do. You need to be ready to manage the diverse experiences you might encounter. One of the tools you require above all else is soothing

Soothing is a basic essential skill learnt in childhood. When parents have tools and are able to self-manage, they might teach or pass on self-regulation to their children.

It is helpful to understand that life will happen. With tools however, you might be in a place to self-soothe during self-parenting. Soothing helps you to ground. This allows you to create solutions and actions in your best interest.

If a child is distressed, we soothe by, hugging them ( touch) , running our hand through their hair, holding them, listening to them speak of their feelings( quality time) speaking words of affirmations and asking them what happened( root cause) and offering own solutions from assessing the situation, and asking what we can do for them, and offering it to them or promising where applicable ( solutions.)

When triggered the first step is to breathe deeply in and out. This is a helpful Soothing technique.

As you assess your trigger and ask yourself root cause questions and create solutions, you also soothe yourself through the act of taking charge of your life and managing yourself.

Applying five love languages and five senses to soothe, hug , talk to your inner child and rock yourself when triggered.

Recognising and meeting Unmet Needs with intermediate and long term solutions is soothing, because it gives you a sense of direction and purpose. Having an idea of what to do can be calming as it feels as if someone is taking care of business.

With these solutions, you intentionally develop a step by step plan to change your attitude and behaviours in the way you respond to triggers, and in the way you resolve your life challenges.

Cathartic shake is helpful to release endorphins and equally soothe and ground you .

Journaling your emotional regulation activity is equally soothing and allows you to record, evaluate and manage your plans or goals.

SIFTSEM is on Amazon.

SIFTSEM TOOL- Sensations, Images, Feelings, Thoughts, Soothing, Endorphin Release, and Meeting Unmet Needs. : A solution focused emotional-regulation and cognitive restructuring tool for triggers.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B08SJLYZWV/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_Y9ECSCZWY7VCY4DMMCFQ