Repeated threats of suicide when you are not doing what they want.

When you are in a relationship with someone who threatens suicide to make you change behaviour, or where you keep doing everything you can to keep the relationship going, you are in an emotionally abusive relationships. Someone who threatens suicide to keep a relationship going, not only has mental health problems, they are also manipulative and abusive. This is a major red flag. This is a needy partner who has childhood unmet needs and and subconsciously applies self-destructive tactics to keep you in the relationship. If someone threatens suicide, call the police, their mental health practitioner and if possible do not engage directly. Let professionals deal with them. The more you engage, the more likely they will be depending on what you say to soothe. Consequently, you might even feel that you owe them a relationship, or they will perish. That is putting too much responsibility on yourself. You do not owe anyone a relationship. In that state, they need mental health interventions, not a relationship. Feelings of guilt will keep you hooked. You might go back, and the unhealthy cycle starts, and this partner keeps making their threats, not taking responsibility for their life. They keep messing up their life with the understanding that you can clean after them. However, the important assessment you need to make is why you are the right fit for this trauma bond. Step back and look into your childhood. Explore what you are trying to fix from your caregivers in this partner. You might find the source of your relationship problems in your family of origin. If you break up and keep going back due to these threats, you as well as your partner need therapy and counselling. It is not possible to continue to stay in such a dynamic, playing these roles, without your own deep traumas. The roots of whatever drew you to the dynamic will require uprooting. If you break up, you need to go no contact and allow them space to deal with their challenges in a professional environment. Their life is their responsibility. Let them know you care, but stick to your boundaries. Do not force them to seek help if they do not want to, if you live together. It is up to you to choose spaces that are fulfillilling for you. While people do suffer from mental health problems, the choice is yours to stay with someone who you are happy to accept as they are. Their life is their responsibility. But you can be supportive to a partner who has mental health issues who is not manipulating you. Their life is their responsibility