Religious and authoritarian strict parent homes

Strict and religious homes and loving too much.

Some people who were brought up in religious families, gravitate towards con artists , dependent on drugs or alcohol or people who are severely troubled.

Some religious parents pretend to be kind and loving everywhere else but home.

Children of religious or pretentious parents believe children exist to help their parents maintain professional charade.

The children are supposed to look perfect by being social charmers who perform well at school and do not get into trouble.

These families might have a lot of tension at home due to criticism between parents sometimes.

Examples are a critical wife and an angry husband. The parents, through their control scare the children into self-denial.

Some people raised in the strict or religious circles rebel and become angry, to reject the values their parents embody. The rebellion is to do the opposite of what the rest of the family does.

The rebel child is infuriated by the pretense to look normal outside. They want the world to know about their dysfunctional family. The rebel plays their role well, because there might be other family members who allow them. Those who are too scared to speak up.

The rebel stirs trouble at school and college. The rebel might get as far away from home as possible.

But, Inside the rebellious person is a confused inner child.

The rebel is restless and unhappy.

The rebel breaks the rules and can become promiscuous, try all kinds of sex, have affairs, and might look after partners who are dysfunctional.

The different sexual involvements are possible because she or he feels little connection with another human being and own body. Promiscuity prevents closeness.

The excitement and drama substitutes any intimacy and intensity.

The rebel does not know that they have a problem. The get into relationships with dangerous people, because they have shut off all their feelings and thrive on drama. They might get into trouble with the law too.

Anger in the rebel comes from helplessness to change the family he/she loved.

When the rebel does not get his/her emotional needs met, they seek relationships where it is possible to control, with people who might not be as educated, as attractive, well off or experienced such as younger men or woman.

Even a sophisticated , intelligent and wealthy rebel woman/man misses cues of how sick and dangerous a lover might be. This happens because of the denial of emotions, and the need to control which outweighs intelligence.

The rebel dominates partners through efforts to help them. Through a very dangerous relationship, perhaps a rebel might wake up.

For a rebel woman, they believe they are a strong woman in charge of a man's welfare.

How to work on the self

The rebel benefits from leaving relationships alone for a while. There is need to heal without a partner to sidetrack him or her.

They need to welcome the painful isolation.

They need to be around groups of other women for females, and men for males, who understand their behaviour and validate their efforts to change.

They need to create a healthy self-relationship. To love and trust herself.

To relate with and relate with other people of the same sex in a support community.

Their inner state is reflected by the relationships they gravitate towards.

They do not need to take care of a partner as a way to relate to them. If they take care of a partner, this just makes the rebel avoid caring for his or herself..

They need to care of themselves.

To love themselves

To let go of distractions with unavailable men or women.

Let go of the intelligence, beautiful, educated or sophisticated woman/man mentality

Let go of using sexuality to attract men or women .

Without developing a self-relationship, the rebel can end up running from relationship to relationship, looking for what is missing.

They need to search at home in the self. They need to change their beliefs of worth to change their life.