Peace of mind The ultimate outcome of practicing objective evaluation

This life is short and while we are here, we can try to live as peacefully, and purposefully as we can. If we are to live a purposeful life, we require tranquility or peace of mind. However, life is full of unpredictability and uncertainty, just like our work environment. Think health and safety at work! If we did not have work systems, we would have too many accidents, injuries and fatalities at work. The number one strategy to learn to be in the moment, is to apply the dichotomy of control. So it is that when we learn objective evaluation and self-care tools, we learn to live in the moment, allow the flow, trust the process and consequently live a tranquil life. Against the background of uncertainty and life's unpredictability, we can only manage if we have skills to navigate the challenging terrain. If we go into every situation, conversation or activity without objective evaluation, we run the risk of emotional and even physical harm. As we strategically enter situations, and address them consciously, we are practising being in the moment. In each situation we remind ourselves of the impermanence of things. Our distress will pass. The conversation will pass.

Relationships end. What we have and the people around us will be taken away too at one point or another. We therefore hold everything loosely, but with deep love and purpose, enjoying it, and understanding it will be recycled. When we consciously enter situations, we choose approaches that minimise or prevent agitation to us. We approach conversation from a place of our own values. We do not intentionally harm others, but we cannot protect them from harm if we need to protect our values. That is self-compassion. We pause and reflect, becsuse it is only in the space that we can consciously choose our interventions, considering differences, and being aware of our own blind spots.

We express ourselves without expectations, demands or entitlement, but without minimising our own desires. We allow others to choose, and allow ourselves to calculate what is best for us from their responses. We move on from manipulation in subtle and direct ways We move on from dysfunctional differences and misunderstandings, with self-parenting and soothing. We let go of what is outside our control. We do not spend time analysing people and try to manipulate them or tune them to our frequency.

We trust and allow others to choose and do what is best for them. That is a result of trusting ourselves.

We trust the process understand that everything will work out.

We enjoy the present moment and what is in front of us, rather than bring stories into every conversation, or invite chaos in interaction. We consciously reflect on self-sabotage , so that we are not shooting our feet. We commit to our goals, and ensure we have something of our own to fall back on that does not involve or require the input of others. We look for situations where our needs are met. We do not attach people to our goals, because we know that people too, have their own goals. We help others. We meditate to practice presence. We practice forgiveness. We live in a state of appreciation. We laugh and we smile. We do not judge, but we guide. We love ourselves with five love languages and five senses We let others off the hook and focus on what matters to us. We introduce tools for conflict resolution and rituals I relationships so that we are not constantly complaining. We are OK making mistakes and apologising. In all this, we understand that others too, have their own moments to live. When we live in the present moment, life is fun. But to learn to be present requires tools for dichotomy of control. To take responsibility for our lives and let go of what is outside our control. Start self-care today. Invest in your SIFTSEM. SIFTSEM is on Amazon SIFTSEM TOOL- Sensations, Images, Feelings, Thoughts, Soothing, Endorphin Release, and Meeting Unmet Needs. : A solution focused emotional-regulation and cognitive restructuring tool for triggers. https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B08SJLYZWV/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_DBGRSQB368638KT4QWJ4