Is your partner talking to other people?

If your partner is openly talking to other people in a monogamous relationship.

That would feel disrespectful. It is also a sympton. A partner who speaks to others while in a relationship is not into you. There are parts of the relationship your partner etc is not happy with. They are basically looking for someone else. They just might not have the guts to leave and look while single and alone.

They might also be hoping that things will change with you, but still continue to look just in case something better comes along.

Reflect on the relationship you agreed on in the first place. If you did not discuss a relationship, you might not be on the same page.

Unless you take action that respects you, there is no incentive for your partner to change. Rather than ask your partner why they are talking to other people, check in with yourself about what you want.

If you are in a long term relationship consider that your partner might no longer feel the same way about the relationship. Rather than try to to question or ask you can start taking action.

There is nothing wrong with people moving on, but it is the way they move on that can affect the abandoned partner. It is helpful if a partner decides what they want and communicate then move on. If they do not feel that they need to explain their intentions, then you equally need to choose yourself. There is obviously a lack of consideration for how you feel.

Ask yourself why you are trying to negotiate or fight for a slot in this person's life? That is convincing mode and forcing outcomes.

There is no point in trying to negotiate with someone who knows what they are supposed to do in a relationship. If you are with someone who is not able to communicate their needs in a healthy way then you need to respect yourself.

If you know your worth, you do not need to negotiate or convince. That is not a job you need to take on.

The best way to deal with people who are disrespectful and who continue to misbehave, is to take action. You can make arrangements to leave , or find a way for them to leave the house.

When you have boundaries on the inside, there is no need to negotiate your value. Start focusing on yourself.

Stop sleeping with your partner also if you have not yet garnered courage to leave.

If you are still trying to map out a way to resolve your situation, you can also start spending time away with family and friends.

Do not reach out to your partner while away. Start creating a lot of space in the relationship. Intentionally. This prepares you for either life without your partner or a life where you prioritise yourself.

People do not change unless they see incentive. Unless you respect yourself, nobody is likely to.

Hard as it might be to hear, you are the only person you can control

Your partner is free to choose what to do with their life. So are you. People are on loan. Sometimes the relationship has reached its use by date. Accept what is and choose what is best for you.