A partner threatens to leave each time there is conflict

When a partner threatens to end a relationship each time you have conflict You need boundaries.

There are factors that might lead to someone doing this in a relationship. Your partner might not be feeling safe. Your partner might not feel heard, acknowledged and understood. Your partner might struggle with conflict resolution skills. Your partner might therefore want to leave, but struggles with boundaries due to a trauma bond.

This is a defensive strategy for people who struggle with boundaries and conflict resolution. Basically, because he might be struggling to put his point across, he then feels that the only way is to leave.

Your partner might whole heartedly want to leave, but the trauma bond might make it challenging.

What might help is to create a safe space for him to express themselves.

People react, lash out, walk out or stall because they do not feel safe.

My suggestion would be to foremost learn to detach, and create space for each person to express themselves in the relationship.

If the situation is intense, focus on yourself and let the dynamic reset.

Introduce conflict resolution hour weekly. Sit down and discuss concerns. Allow this process to develop gradually. For many people, this is an alien concept, but it is a conscious way of doing relationship.

Learn to appreciate each other, so that when you express a concern, someone does not feel as if that is all you talk about. If you sometimes compliment and appreciate a partner, it is easy for him or her to listen to criticism.

Learn self-parenting, so that you open up to different perspective, learn active listening and learn to act in your best interest. This prevents self-sabotage.

Recognise your conflict resolution patterns and how you might need to adjust some approaches in relationship.