A partner needs space away from a relationship

When a partner or the person you are dating asks for space away from the relationship to focus on something personal, here are some tips to consider:

When someone is telling you that they need space to focus on themselves, it is an indication that for now this particular relationship is not a priority for them. It means that they are not invested in the relationship.

You might need to understand that, if someone wants to be with you they are aware that life will happen. They might even have problems in their life, but if the relationship is stable you can work through everything together.

If someone wants to be with you they will not put you themselves in a position where they might lose you. By telling you that they went to space, it is an indication that they do not mind losing you at the moment.

No matter what is going on in their life, if this relationship was something that they wanted and they did not want to lose, then they would find a way to deal with their situation while in a relationship.

The bottom line here is that, you need to read the cues in your relationship and your partner. These excuses do not come about exclusively. There are most likely problems in the relationship.

Someone might just be trying to find a way out of the relationship. Maybe they do not know how to be honest with you and tell you they want to leave. It could be that they have tried but have failed, or they do not want to hurt you directly.

Additionally the fact that someone might want space from the relationship is an indication that they feel pressured. Whatever is causing the pressure is something that is either to do with how you are showing up. Or it could be to do with them, and the impact of the relationship on their life and their priorities. It still means it has you written on it.

This is not necessarily a reason to make this personal. It is simply an indication of the stability of the relationship. It might therefore be naive, to believe that someone who asks you for space is going to come back to you you.

However, what is important here is not that they might not come back. What matters is that you take control of your life and you make decisions in your best interest. Decisions that are not based on what someone else wants.

And this means you do not allow someone to come and go as they wish in your life. So in that time or space where they are asking for time away from the relationship, it is helpful and important for you to detach. Do your own thing even if it means you start dating again.

The caveat, is that, in this space, you might need to explore healing work, but not focus on them or have any expectations to go back to them. Even if they decide to come back to you, it is going to need to be a new relationship where they date you from scratch.

It helps you to make sure that your terms are applied in that relationship, should you choose to go back. You will need to explore the reason why they left in the first place and the reason why they feel that it is ok to come back and start over again. If you allow people to come and go as they wish, this might lead to a rollercoaster ride. 🎢