10 Reasons the person you're with is not leaving you even though the relationship is unhappy

Reasons the person you're with is not leaving you even though the relationship is unhappy

1. Easy access to sex

Your unhealthy partner might just stay around because they can easily sleep with you without much effort.

Sex is an important aspect of relationship and your partner might want to avoid the hassle of looking for a new partner for sex.

2. You partner doesn't see the need to break up because if they're doing relationship on their terms there's no effort for them.

When some people are in charge of a situation, they do not wish to let go of the reigns. So they stay put as long as you put up with their controlling behaviour.

3. They get relationship benefits and status which society pushes on people. This includes companionship and chores.

In a relationship where you provide financially for a partner, or you have kids so they meet the society expectation of being in a family or you do choresfor them, they might not want to change behaviour. But they enjoy the benefits of being in a relationship.

4. There is no incentive to change if you stick around and continue as if all is well

People need something to respect in relationships if they are to change. If you're not initiating a break up or leaving your partner, you're telling them you're OK with the status quo.

5. They are controlling and you have no boundaries. If you had boundaries they would treat you better or leave.

People who have control tendencies will usually recognise their weakness if a partner leaves or pauses relationship. If you think by not standing up for yourself or leaving you're helping your relationship, recognise this behaviour makes it worse.

6. You're both desperate for a relationship and they keep taking that for granted.

If you're not making changes in an unhealthy relationship but you stay, your partner detects your desperation. And if a partner treats you badly but stay, they're equally desperate for a relationship. Something has to give. You need to be picky about the relationship you stay in.

7. You rely on them financially and they believe you cannot survive without them.

If a relationship partner is providing for you then they might take you for granted and continue relationship. This is because they believe they're paying you to stay. Get your own money by looking for work and not relying on this person.

8. They know something about you they can use as leverage if you leave and you're scared of this information coming out.

Sometimes your partner might hold you at ransom because you fear that secrets you shared with them will be exposed if you leave. Hopefully, you didn't commit a major crime, otherwise, let them tell the world while you gain your peace.

9. You know something about them that they've threatened you about sharing especially if you leave.

Your partner might also have threatened you because you know something about them that they fear you might disclose.

10. You have nobody to go to so they feel they own you.

When you have no support an unhealthy relationship partner takes you for granted and continues to mistreat you. They continue the relationship and their treatment of you because they believe you've nowhere to run.

Reflect on this,

What do you want in a relationship

Is this it?

Is this healthy treatment?

Why are you putting up with it?

It is it up to you whether you break up or not Is it not up to the person who's not happy. You have the power to make changes in your life.

Keeping around people who aren't good for you can block you from getting into a healthy relationship.

Look into and heal codependency

Work on self-love for worthiness

Heal the inner child to connect with yourself.

Assess the type of parents who raised you.

Practice a self-care habit

Learn the impermanence of things. People are on loan. But you need to stay around people who allow you to grow. Life is short